Sometimes you find yourself in a bar and a band you've never heard of takes the stage. They plug in their guitars. You look them over, study their haircuts, their shoes, their choice of instruments. There's a moment of anticipation. They could be a brilliant up-and-coming act making their soon-to-be legendary debut. They could be decently entertaining for the course of their thirty minute set. But chances are, they're neither.

The drummer removing his shirt could not save this performance. The lead singer tilting the microphone stand and letting his hair fall in his eyes could not make his vocals more compelling. This band was so mediocre, so utterly forgettable, that it made me a little sick to listen to them.

I have worked on the music of hundreds of mediocre bands, but most of them have at least one defining characteristic - one catchy song, a charming heart worn on a sleeve, charismatic stage presence, a clever lyric, a hook, a soul, choreography, shiny pants, something that makes me feel their dedication to their music.

This band? I don't even think they were having fun.

My husband said they were a bit like leftover Jane's Addiction, if you removed everything that was great about Jane's Addiction.

Today I came across a record of demos of #1 hits from the 1980s - Number One With A Bullet. It seemed strange that anyone would release a record of demos, which, by their nature, sound unpolished, a little dusty, slightly soulless. Even stranger, this record was reviewed in the New York Times.

Of course I had to slap it on the turntable. What did I learn from listening to the demo versions of Walk Like An Egyptian and Nightshift? Sometimes the star makes the song. Sometimes the song is already made. Sometimes what you need is a producer.

A colleague posed this question:

Worldwide, who do you think is more popular: Celine Dion or Bob Marley?