I am not talking about records. I am talking about stationary bikes. This surprises even me. Is there anything worse than when your spin instructor has no innate musicality and tries to make you spin off the beat? Yes, I am aware, there are worse things, but that won't stop me from complaining about bad music choices in my gym classes. It drives me nuts when my instructor contradicts the beat by making us do interval sprints based on made up timing rather than the natural verse/chorus flow of the song. So here are a few suggestions:

I'm always a year or two (or, uh, ten or twenty) behind the times with my workout music choices, but can we talk about how supremely satisfying it is to spin (or run) to selections from Santigold's Master of My Make Believe? "Disparate Youth" is my go-to hill climbing song, and "GO!" (featuring Karen O) is magical for interval sprints. Regina Spektor's amped up theme song to Orange Is The New Black, "You've Got Time," has interval sprints built right into the song structure. How about Metric's "Youth Without Youth," the BPM of which perfectly matches my running pace?

Maybe, I'll concede, I'm overly sensitive because I'm an audio engineer, not an athlete. But is it too much to ask for a little musicality in my spin class instruction? That would distract me from the ridiculousness of riding a stationary bike in a room full of people riding stationary bikes. What can I say? It's been a long winter in NYC.

My son got a spy toy for his birthday - a stealthy microphone transmitter and a receiver with earpiece. Never mind that our apartment is so small, it's pretty much impossible to have a covert conversation anywhere. The frequency this surveillance tool operates at is right around 105.9. Which also happens to be the signal of WQXR, a classical radio station in the NYC area. Which means all my son hears in his earpiece is Berlioz and Haydn and Chopin. He's not complaining. I'm not complaining. But, really? The toy designers chose a single frequency, and it's right smack dab in the middle of the FM radio range?

The other night, I quickly scanned my husband's Spotify Easy Listening / Exotica playlist folder to find some appropriate dinner music and landed on Hugo Montenegro'sCrazy Arms. As we ate, with the mellow strings of the Hugo Montenegro orchestra in the background, I kept commenting, "Oh, hey, we sang this song in my country harmony singing class." Crazy Arms. Making Believe. More and More. I could sing the high tenor on like half the songs on this album. Which led me to wonder, was my country harmony teacher a Hugo Montenegro fan? Or was Hugo Montenegro a fan of country harmony?